Yes, kicking!

"Did you see it moving?" I asked Mr Bea.

"Moving?"

"Yes, waving its arms and legs, rolling around..."

"Arms and legs?"

"Those appendages coming off the torso?"

"Which bit was the torso?"

I gave up. I can be excited on my own.

We were given the talk about prenatal testing. We have decided against it. The clinic, like most, uses four data points to work out your risk of genetic abnormality. The first is age, which we already know, and luckily we are at low risk here. The second is hCG level, which we already know, and we are at low risk there. The third is pregnancy-associated plasma-protein A, which I believe (and will shortly confirm by googling) is often falsley positive where the pregnancy is conceived through ICSI and/or FET, so we may be at high risk there, but it may not mean anything. The fourth is the nuchal translucency scan - a vague sort of test at best, which is why they only use it in combination with all the other data points. Definitive diagnosis, of course, requires invasive testing which carries some risk of, well, baby death.

Neither of us are naive enough to say we would "never terminate anyway". We both agree, for example, that it would be more practical to terminate a doomed pregnancy early than to take on the risks associated with carrying to term and delivering. But it's also true that it would take a lot for us to terminate this pregnancy - a lethal defect is one thing, but what about the huge grey area?

At the end of the day it's about deciding what risks to take. We are loathe to take the risk of miscarrying a possibly healthy pregnancy, and we're not certain how high our chances of a genetic defect would have to be for us to take that risk. We will not risk doing a test which comes back looking equivocal or high risk, causing us undue pressure and stress. We will take the risk of carrying an abnormal baby to term in ignorance when we could have terminated more safely and with less emotional trauma, or prepared ourselves for the difficult task of raising a disabled child, if we had only known.

Therefore, the next appointment is not for two weeks. Til then, as always, let the dice roll.


39 Comments

Rachel Inbar said...

Yippppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

I am so happy for you!!!

I also chose to skip most of the tests (except when the doctor or my husband felt them necessary). I don't think the NT scan is terribly inaccurate, but they didn't have it when I was pregnant with my older kids & they turned out OK :-)

So glad you got to see him/her moving around!!!

Bea said...

I guess it depends what you mean by "inaccurate". The leaflet we were given reports a detection rate (sensitivity) of 80% using nuchal translucency and age alone, which for us is not good enough. (It doesn't give the rather scarier false positive rate.)

Bea

Tam said...

I am so so happy for you, and happy to hear that baby is kicking and moving around!!

I would also be in two minds about all those tests, in the end it comes down to whether you would abort or not, I don't think that I ever could but it's a personal choice. You do what you think is best for you and Mr Bea!!

Good luck!

Portia P said...

So pleased for you Bea! Enjoy this fantastic time.

xx

Geohde said...

Antenatal screening is a difficult decision to make.

We chose to screen, wirried about one anomoly, and got a less common one. Of course.

Do you know that in a perverse way, it was more difficult to terminate a pregnancy that we knew was doomed? I mean, there was no issue of lifelong care to consider, and what if it turns out to be the only pregnancy I ever get?

If I never manage another, it will bother me forever. Even though I made the only decision that I could at the time.


J

Mel said...

Can I say YAY!!!! Bea!
When I saw on your post that there was kicking, I burst into tears.
I am really really happy for you both.
take care
(((HUGS)))
Mel

Mands said...

Fantastic Bea! And we can all be excited too!
As for those tests, like to go for the "head in the sand approach". I am a big chicken with stuff like that, and I do agree that it's a very personal thing. I hope that whatever you choose to do works out for the best.

M said...

*exhale*

This is all very, very good... x

Nina said...

Tjoooohooooo!!! Kicking!!!

About the NT test, I freaked myself out because of it. In the end I wished I hadn't since the test only gives you a risk analysis anywyas. Both Sara and Mony had high risks in their NT scans and once they did the amnios got an all clear.

Do what you think is right. You need to decide that for yourself. If you get the NT scan you can also see it as another opportunity to look at the Insider :-), that's what convinced me to take the test in the end.

The Momcaster said...

now how fabulous is this news?!
congratulations!!
take care of yourself =)

Vee said...

Yaaaay! Great news ! and kicking how very exciting.

Yes I agree, do what you feel most comfortable with.

Jules said...

I can't remember whether I've said it yet Bea.................

CONGRATULATIONS!!! :D

Beagle said...

Fantasitic!

(now you can go back to distracting the Mr. with your new boobage!)

So glad to hear this news!

ms. c said...

Congrats Bea. This is just fantastic.

Samantha said...

This is wonderful news!

I don't know what to say about the screening except that if you're comfortable with your decision, it's probably the way to go. False positives would make me pretty leery too.

TeamWinks said...

So glad you got to see the arms waving a reassuring "Hi out there!" Too fun!

The Town Criers said...

Woohoo! That is fantastic :-)

P.S. I also opted not to do testing.

Sunny Jenny said...

Kick away! Congratulations! That is so exciting. I am hoping that everything continues to go well! I am so happy for you!

Somewhat Ordinary said...

YAY!!!!! I love the opening of this post. Isn't it wild how little it is yet it just wiggles and kicks around like crazy.

I agree-do what you feel comfortable with and don't let the doctors pressure you.

singletracey said...

WHOOOHOOOOO!!!! Great news!!!

Heather said...

We don't need him to be excited!!! He didn't get worked up over your great rack (I totally did! In a straight but I'm comfortable enough with my sexuality to admire another female form kind of way.) and we still don't need him to be happy now!!!!!!!

Stephanie said...

Congrats!! That is so wonderful and I am very happy for you! Yahoo!

elizabeth said...

Yay! That's wonderful!

GLouise said...

Hurrah!!!

Lut C. said...

First of all, congratulations on the kicking little one in there! FABULOUS!

You're decision on the testing makes a lot of sense.

Schatzi said...

Congratulations!!! I am so excited you saw "kickage"! Ummm. Nothing to add of prenatal testing. Just wishing you the best.

JJ said...

Fantastic news Bea!

Tina said...

Hooray!! Congratulations!!! It is so amazing, isn't to, to see the movement???

Aurelia said...

Congratulations on movement! A huge sign, very very good!

As for testing issue, I've had the NT test several times and I was part of the original study group when it was being checked. Accuracy depends on what it's for. No test is good for everything, right? It is very very accurate for Down's - Trisomy 21, as is the PAPP-A, and I know most people who get those are ones who have had fertility treatment of some kind.
It is also highly accurate for spinal deformities like spina bifida, and since in utero surgery can repair that, there is a benefit to early diagosis.

The NT is less accurate, as in false negatives, for Trisomy 18, and 13 and fragile X, which are the only major chromosomal abnormalities that can make it past 12 weeks. However, with these problems, the baby will have a great deal of trouble moving on screen and the defects are completely obvious at 18 weeks and sometimes even 15 weeks. (Yes, those wiggling appendages ARE a good sign.)

The false positive rate, and the earlier perception of risk for CVS and amnio, come from the use of low resolution U/S instead of high resolution, and from the scans being done by less well trained techs and Docs. At my genetics clinic they have never had a false positive. I'm quite sure it would be rare to unheard of at your clinic in Singapore from what you have written. Same for your clinic in Aus.

You are probably fine with just scans, but it can't hurt to get them to check the NT, and it might be incredibly reassuring? Right?

Sorry Bea, I'm not trying to be a problem with this long comment, but I've had to terminate after a fatal diagnosis, so I just wanted you to know, those tests can be useful sometimes.

Lori said...

So glad about your news, Bea!

Pamela Jeanne said...

Most excellent! ;-)

serenity said...

WOO FREAKING HOO!!!! That's great.

We skipped the early testing too, including the NT scan. At times I worry that I was stupid to do so, but so much of this stuff seems to be rolling the dice that I just try and let it roll off my back.

And part of me wants to try and be as "normal" as possible. Huh. (You know, live in ignorant bliss? Or something not quite ignorant, nor bliss.)

Anyway, thus far the "stick our heads in the sand" strategy seems to be working for us.

So far, anyway.

Jess said...

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEA!!! Wonderful!!

Bumble said...

Fan-friggin-tastic Bea!

So so happy for you both!!!!

steph said...

I gotta go with the 'what is that' response to the ultra sound! My friends all showed me theirs and I never did get anything out of it.
Maybe would be different if it were my own? Unlikely!

Congrats to you and your ginormous ta-tas.

My Reality said...

Wonderful, wonderful news, Bea!!

And congrats on the huge tits! :)

millie said...

Yay!!!! Such freakin' fantastic news. Just yay!

Piccinigirl said...

WOW!!!! So glad you got to see he/she moving around. Those are great moments.

we did the NT scan but not the bloodwork that went with it, also the bw for 16weeks but I didn't drive myself crazy with it, just prayed that things would be ok. I think that if your heart and gut are saying, "don't do it" that's a good enough reason not to.

megan said...

so happy to hear about your scan. that's such great news.
the testing decision is a tough one. we too opted out. our only realy option was the triple blood screen, as we would have to go private and pay for an NT scan. the triple screen has such a high rate of false positives i thought it would be insane for an anxious soul like me to do it. i'll have a detailed u/s at week 19, but nothing else unless the u/s dictates. . .

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