This is going to sound far-fetched, but it's true, I swear.

I was sitting at my computer reading about an online friend of mine getting yet another negative pregnancy test after yet another IVF cycle, when all of a sudden a figure appeared before me. He mostly looked like a man, but there were huge wings and it was kind of hard to focus on his face what with the bright light eminating from his crown. Luckily I didn't have to pick out his features to recognise him, because he has this button pinned to his robe which said, "Hi! My name's Gabriel! Ask me about our Eternal Life Offer!" I was a little stunned, so he broke the silence.

"Why do you let it happen?" he asked. And he seemed to be looking at me.

"Why don't you do something?" he continued, when instead of replying I merely sat, looking confused. "You know," he prompted, "seeing as how you're the patron saint of fertility these days?"

"I'm the...?"

"Patron Saint... Look, haven't you been receiving your supplications?"

I shook my head slowly. "How can I be a Patron Saint of Fertility?" I asked him. "First of all, I'm not fertile. Secondly, I don't believe in Saints. Very dark-ages church politics stuff if you ask me. And don't you have to be dead?"

He just looked at me sternly and handed me a USB memory stick, which I dutifully plugged into my notebook. And there they all were. I felt a wrenching in my gut as I looked at all the infertile women who had been asking me - begging me - to petition Our Father on their behalf. And all this time I'd been blissfully unaware. I felt sick. Physically ill at the sudden sensation of terrific and overwhelming remorse.

Then Gabriel put his hand on my shoulder. "Come now," he said gently. What's done is past. Let's look to the future. You can start with your friend."

And you know what? I did. And although she's sad now, I can assure her a healthy pregnancy is only just around the corner, with the most adorable child to boot.

And, one by one, I'll get around to the rest of you, too. So hang in there - I haven't forgotten you! I promise!


2 Comments

Antago said...

My friend, prengnacy is a wonderful thing—but in today's society an indulgence when pursued with intention. Stop drinking the intoxic fumes of her whimsic allure; adopt a child and relent of your genetic passion! Society needs you.

Bea said...

Hi Antago. Welcome to my blog. Please have a read through.

Like most infertile couples, we did look into adoption before we pursued infertility treatments. Adoption was not actually available to us at the time, at all. A few months after this post was written we accepted an international relocation in order to have the chance to adopt - a move which may be considered to be above and beyond the call by some! It's certainly not an opportunity available to all.

Pursuit of pregnancy was also advised by my doctors due to health issues (both before and during the discovery and treatment of our infertility), so that weighed into our decision as well, as you will see reading through the blog.

There seems to be a myth that there are thousands of children sitting in orphanages just twiddling their thumbs until someone finally puts up their hands to adopt them and bring them back to their country, where they will live happily ever after. The truth is, of course, very different, as anyone who has ever adopted or thought seriously about adoption will know.

We have no current plans to expand our family.

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