tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post771073277284068816..comments2023-08-26T01:04:43.031+10:00Comments on Infertile Fantasies: The Time Traveller's Wife - Barren Bitches Book Brigade Tour Three **Now With Alert Commenter Question**Beahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11877513815828460269noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-86471730164686178442007-04-24T21:22:00.000+10:002007-04-24T21:22:00.000+10:00That's a very good song too. It's always interest...That's a very good song too. It's always interesting to see what songs others come up with on that question. I also agree with your answer to number two. I think that was basically what I was trying to say too.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-23187892832596550002007-04-22T05:24:00.000+10:002007-04-22T05:24:00.000+10:00I loved this book when I read it a couple of years...I loved this book when I read it a couple of years ago. My husband read it first and it really got to him. What really stuck out to me was how Henry knew that while infertility was tough they would get to the other side. How nice it would be to have that reassurance.milliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09710325487325258355noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-75989549200313727602007-04-19T11:06:00.000+10:002007-04-19T11:06:00.000+10:00Q2 almost seems to ask, 'if you are infertile, sho...Q2 almost seems to ask, 'if you are infertile, should you attempt to have children?' There are so many things you can pass on to your children, both good and bad. <BR/><BR/>Hopefully you can help your kid(s) prepare for the bad and enjoy the good like Henry does.Nicolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10607197025263628273noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-81187470099398357612007-04-18T10:34:00.000+10:002007-04-18T10:34:00.000+10:00I love "Parallel Roads". I think that says a lot ...I love "Parallel Roads". I think that says a lot about the experience of many couples at one point or another.<BR/><BR/>BeaBeahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11877513815828460269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-14416374455152841912007-04-18T10:29:00.000+10:002007-04-18T10:29:00.000+10:00My husband is very hurt by our infertility but he ...My husband is very hurt by our infertility but he deals with it in such a different way. He doesn't let it consume it like I become consumed. But how can he be consumed when I am the one feeling it all and waiting and all that jazz. He also doesn't understand why I want to hide from people sometimes. Or I say that if one more person in this group gets pregnant I will have to bow out. He thinks that is awful. <BR/><BR/>Parallel roads would be us. (sorry my spelling sucks) There are times we touch and feel the same but other times we just walk side by side feeling different things. Almost experiencing our own different journey.<BR/><BR/>Great question.Sunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14570018200281339937noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-48399813875683357122007-04-18T06:26:00.000+10:002007-04-18T06:26:00.000+10:00OH WOW, your question is a great one. I have to s...OH WOW, your question is a great one. I have to say that it IS a reflection of how society views IF. What an interesting thought. I'd have to think about what our struggle would be called. WOWlittleangelkisseshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04140422279498772797noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-57318297172367251192007-04-18T00:34:00.000+10:002007-04-18T00:34:00.000+10:00Oh...that is a freakin' great question. And somet...Oh...that is a freakin' great question. And something I didn't really notice at all. But definitely--with IF, it's the couple's problem, but it seems to be (1) carried forward by the woman in a hetero relationship and (2) only the woman is perceived to have emotions about it.<BR/><BR/>That's why I asked how Adam is doing because I'm sure he's crushed too. I liked how Josh wrote about how men view IF and pg loss in his post. I think I was always focused on the baby and he was focused on me. And what we were doing wasn't real until he could feel the babies kicking. Therefore, any babies lost early in the pregnancy were abstract to him. They weren't abstract to me. At the same time, I know that even though his focus was on me, he was equally crushed each cycle. He wrote this heartbreaking note to our future child inside my journal one night. Simply begging the baby to come. And I knew from that that while he put up a good front, he hurt a lot too.<BR/><BR/>I think women are also more willing to discuss their feelings, therefore, they receive more comfort. <BR/><BR/>Great question. What are other peoples' take on it?Lollipop Goldsteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01020874415819057995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-56313922128941250482007-04-17T14:19:00.000+10:002007-04-17T14:19:00.000+10:00In real life, well in my case, the story of infert...In real life, well in my case, the story of infertility is as much my husband's story as mine. He's less vocal about it, but his loss is as deep as mine. I've seen it in his eyes, witnessed it in his actions and felt it in my soul. What would our story be called...well it's the story I named my novel after, "A Hole in the Heart."Pamela T.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11474998003921896431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-79911200336658726612007-04-17T10:46:00.000+10:002007-04-17T10:46:00.000+10:00The alert commenter? I have a terrible feeling th...The alert commenter? I have a terrible feeling that this was one of those times where I missed something. But if you have another TTW question, throw it out, dear Bea.<BR/><BR/>I love your answer to the second question especially this: There was a point at which I wondered if it was responsible to bring a child into this world under the circumstances. But it's impossible to predict what obstacles we'll face and how things will turn out. I could use my genes, and everything could end up just fine, or I could opt not to use my genes, and in doing so create or uncover a whole new set of problems, perhaps worse than before.<BR/><BR/>I don't know if we can ever make choices that are "responsible" in that regard because (1) no child asks to be born so we have no idea if they wished to be alive prior to birth and (2) we all have "imperfect" genes that we pass along. In regards to (1), I sometimes question when people are complaining about how their parents had them regardless of X, X, and X (for instance, if Alba was to complain about time travel), but what is the alternative? To not be alive at all? I'm never sure how to respond to those arguments. I understand the speaker's point and I feel for them that they were put into a situation, but who in this world gets to decide whether or not they want to be born or which type of situation they wish to be born into or if they want their parent's stinkin' time traveling genes? As for (2) well...I just want to apologize in advance for the high cholesterol.<BR/><BR/>Great thoughts.Lollipop Goldsteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01020874415819057995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-20640012224262892252007-04-16T23:02:00.000+10:002007-04-16T23:02:00.000+10:00Oh Bea, I so agree with everything you wrote, abou...Oh Bea, I so agree with everything you wrote, about Life being a risk and having to live within those lines. It's the hardest part of this journey for me. <BR/>You answered all of this beautifully.Kirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17894442143508446312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-18676526940459993732007-04-16T11:26:00.000+10:002007-04-16T11:26:00.000+10:00Love how you answered the questions. I enjoyed the...Love how you answered the questions. I enjoyed the book but pulled out from the tour because I wasn't sure I would have time to answer and post it. Maybe I'll join in the next tour.<BR/><BR/>I agree. Life is all about taking risks! We just have to deal with what we have, roll with the punches and make the most of our lives.<BR/><BR/>Music makes us time travel. There are songs that bring me back to past experiences and memories. Old songs definitely make me reminisce.Baby Blueshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09283845137728737575noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-43363119441803703952007-04-16T10:45:00.000+10:002007-04-16T10:45:00.000+10:00Oh music can take you far back into time. It can ...Oh music can take you far back into time. It can also tear your heart out over and over again. <BR/><BR/>The Wreckers will always remind me of this year. The year that didn't go as planned.Sunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14570018200281339937noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-47535958297004417682007-04-16T05:55:00.000+10:002007-04-16T05:55:00.000+10:00I agree that life is about taking risks, plus I th...I agree that life is about taking risks, plus I think Henry recognized how his life was unique because of his time traveling abilities and he had the potential to share this ability with his child. It was a risk, in the sense that it could end up being a terrible burden, but also a gift to Alba. Her life could be that much more risky and rewarding.Samanthahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02799401502134619497noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25184159.post-43002222765299114622007-04-16T03:45:00.000+10:002007-04-16T03:45:00.000+10:00I haven't read this book, nor had I really planned...I haven't read this book, nor had I really planned to. After reading your review, I think I might just go and get a copy. <BR/><BR/>You are 100% right Bea, life is about managing risks and walking that fine line.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com